Nostalgic.

somehow, deliberately have this urge to blog.
as i desperately need someone to talk to,
despondently, there isn't any one for me to pour out to.
life is full or curves, up and down. no doubt about that.
it's all part of growing up; adolesence.

friends? what's friend?
someone who would be there for you when you are down,
someone who would be there for you in terms of trouble,
someone who would be there for you when you are about to turn insane,
someone who would be there and share to you all their happiness,
someone who would be there and give you a listening ear if you ever need one,
someone who would be there and love you for who you really are,
chiefly,
someone who just want to be with you and be there for you without expecting
anything in return.

i do have one, but i felt that she deserve someone better.
same goes to all my ex lover, they deserve much better.
i'm aint whining down here like a bitch,
nor definitely i aint expecting any sympathy from any one.
& just to be genuine, i need no sympathy from no one.

i just felt that, it's time to distant myself away from them.
no matter what's the outcome, i think it'll be much better for them.
might sound selfish in a sense,
but i really cant purge myself away from all the harted i had within myself.
i know no one is perfect, if they were perfect, they would'd already be god.
but, i'm not even in the category of normal.
i'd desolated myself away by my very own hand.
&the tattoo i had will maim me for life.
living in the prison of my own creation huh?

i know i could never be able to turn back time, never.
it takes time to bury this load of mine,
till then, sorry my friends..